Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Stepping into 2015

Here we are stepping into 2015 and with gratefulness anticipating another year of God using Haven for the Heart to strengthen ministries, marriages and individual hearts toward deeper connection with the Lord and one another.  So many in leadership are struggling and simply need a safe setting to share their hearts and move forward in their relationships and ministries.  It is our passion to provide a Haven where others feel safe to share their hearts with a couple who know the challenges of ministry and truly care about the challenges they are facing. There have been many opportunities in this past year to do this very thing and we are so thankful for the growing team of partners in this endeavor.  

What are others saying about Haven for the Heart?
“At various points, Dr. Mike Dittman and Pam have been an influential part of my life for the past thirty years.  Mike pastored me so well when I was in college, and today he and Pam’s marriage, life, and ministry continue to challenge and inspire me.  Their emphasis on refusing to accept anything less than authentic community is a biblical and prophetic message in a culture that is becoming increasingly alienated and superficial.  They are both gifted teachers, but their ministry is also one of “presence.”  You have to spend time with them in the same room to “get” it.  Though there are literally hundreds of people who do what I do, I don’t know of a single other couple that does precisely what Mike and Pam do.  That is why I am so eager to support their ministry and encourage others to be as blessed as I have by sitting under their teaching and counsel.” - Gary Thomas (author/speaker)

“After two decades in ministry, I’d gained a respectable level of proficiency, a solid reputation, and the trust of many. But truth be known, I was exhausted and losing touch with my call.  I was surviving, but barely. I was badly in need of spiritual CPR. I got exactly that and more after spending several days with Mike. If you need your heart revived, and your sense of call renewed, contact Haven for the Heart right away.” - Ken Jones (pastor)

Words fail us; we cannot thank you enough for hearing our story, loving us and pouring into our lives. We are forever grateful. Thank you for your beautiful ministry. The accommodations were absolutely perfect. We couldn’t have been any more comfortable and relaxed. Thank you for each wonderful detail and for the delicious food. We intend to take what you have given us and continue to allow God to bless our broken road and use us for His glory. Our “beautiful mess” is for His purpose and glory. You will be in our hearts and in our prayers. Believing God to continue to pour into you and anoint you so that you can continue to hugely impact others as you have us. We love you and your family.” 
- Pastoral Couple who participated in a Haven for the Heart Retreat



Experience a Haven for the Heart Retreat in 2015
We have found that as much as individuals and couples long for a safe haven to share the battles they face in their relationships and ministries, they also long to learn how to offer a haven for the hearts of others.  Join us for a Haven for the Heart Retreat to do this very thing! Come as a individual, couple, small group of ministry team. 
*Click here to learn more about what a Haven for the Heart Retreat can offer YOU!

Haven for the Heart Leadership Training Seminars & Mentoring Workshops
Mike will be doing several leadership training seminars and mentoring workshops to instruct and model how to do the CPR process.  We want to help others build communities (marriages, teams, groups and churches) that are genuinely transformational and missional.  Contact Mike for details.
*Click here to listen to several short podcasts interviews about facilitating life changing groups and the CPR process.

What’s Happening Right Here in Michigan?
Mike plans on offering a Connections Class at Grace Community Church in Commerce, Michigan as well coaching clinics for leaders from a wide range of ministries in our community.

We’re Here for You
If you or someone you know wants to experience the CPR process or be equipped to lead transformational communities, we would love to be a Haven for your Heart so that you can be a Haven for the Hearts of others!

Please be a part of our P.A.S.T.

Our Prayer Advisory Support team provides the personal and financial backing that frees us to invest in the lives of others.  We truly need you in a variety of ways!  Please consider joining our P.A.S.T.!

Sunday, November 23, 2014



How I wish each of you would be walking through our door on Thanksgiving allowing the opportunity to relax, catch up with each other and enjoy a slice of apple pie, or pumpkin if that is your favorite! Okay, well maybe not all of you walking through the door on November 27th, but I truly would extend Thanksgiving day to a month if it meant that we could enjoy that laid back, cozy fun day with each of you!

It has been wonderful to open our home over this past year and offer over 27 Haven for the Heart retreats! It was during these times that ministry couples and leadership teams: 
  • furthered their understanding of how to connect with God
  • strengthened their relationship with each other 
  • gained a clearer vision and deeper passion for their ministries

Christian leaders have travelled to us, and Mike has travelled across the country to the churches and homes of those who are devoted to equipping believers and spreading the gospel to the world around them. The assumption is often made that our pastors and their families are always intact and what is often seen as “smooth sailing on a Sunday morning” is often not the case. They, like each of us, are often consumed with relational, emotional and spiritual struggles that often get set aside or pushed down so that they can tend to the needs of their people. They often feel there is no place to be transparent with the real issues they are facing.  The New York Times (2010) gives us some interesting input.


The statistics are alarming:

  • Members of the clergy now suffer from obesity, hypertension and depression at rates higher than most Americans.  In the last decade, their use of antidepressants has risen, while their life expectancy has fallen.  Many would change jobs if they could.
  • 23% have been fired or pressured to resign at least once in their careers.
  • 1 in 4 don’t know where to turn when they have a family or personal crisis.
  • 1/3 of pastors wives say that being in ministry in an outright hazard to their family life.
  • 45% of pastors say they’ve experienced depression or burnout so severe that they need to take a leave of absence from the church.
  • 57% would leave the ministry for good if they had somewhere else to go or some other vocation they could do.
  • 80% believe that pastoral ministry negatively affect their families.
  • Clergy now ranks 3rd (behind doctors and lawyers) as the career path most likely to send you into drug abuse, alcoholism and suicide.
1,500 pastors per month leave their ministries due to burnout, conflict or more failure.

The health of any church family or household community is rooted in the quality of its relationships and leadership - 

Haven for the Heart is a ministry focused on helping to start and strengthen a wide range of ministries that are "spiritually alive in Christ, relationally connected to one-another and missionally engaged in the world." It is our belief that the transformation of lives happens as God’s people gather together in small communities and the Holy Spirit uses each other's gifts to build up one another. In some situations people need more intensive counseling, but in the majority of cases what they really need is community! When we do personal counseling it is designed to get people into one-anothering communities with caring and compassionate friends. 

Through Haven for the Heart we help encourage and equip teams of shepherding servants who can model and mentor spiritual maturity. It is our conviction that biblical spirituality and community are rooted in healthy leaders/teams. The spiritual maturity of those parenting our kids and pastoring our flocks is critical. 


We cannot do this work without you -

Along with those of you who are part of our PAST (Prayer Advisory Support Team), we have an amazing church family that provides a home base of ongoing encouragement and accountability.

Please consider being a donor to help underwrite our annual Haven for the Heart budget of $40,000.  There are various ways to contribute, but here is an example of what your donation could provide: 
  • $1,000 donation underwrites a Haven for the Heart retreat and a one year coaching contract for individuals, couples or teams of leaders. leaders.
  • $100/month donation underwrites a Haven for the Heart Retreat and a one year coaching contract for a kingdom worker, couple or leadership team.
  • $50/month provides a Haven for the Heart retreat for a kingdom worker, ministry couple or leadership team.
  • $25/month provides a mentoring session for a kingdom worker, ministry couple or leadership team

*You may send donation checks to:
Haven for the Heart
5415 Starwood Dr.

Commerce, MI 48382

Wednesday, October 1, 2014


I wish it were possible for each of you to sit in on a Haven retreat, somehow preserving confidentiality, so that you could see the incredible things Jesus does as we gather with various couples in our living room.  I know that this is impossible, but Mike and I walk away from times like we have had over the past weeks filled with joy, hope and awe.  As couples walk out of our front door we so often look at each other and say, "What just happened?"  It truly isn't us, it is God at work!  It is so exciting!  We just wish we could share it with you in more detailed ways.

Last week we had a couple in who were about as broken and hurting as we have seen in a long time.  The pain from this individuals past was so intense and had been hidden for so long.  Holding a position of leadership in the church unfortunately added to his feelings of isolation.  The wonderful part was knowing there was another pastor in his church that knew the pain he was experiencing and cared enough about this couple to find help for them.  They felt safe to share their story and explore ways to help bring restoration and hope to their lives and ministry.

This week we had a couple participate in a one day marriage retreat.  This couple felt little hope and was ready to say goodbye to each other and their marriage.  To be honest, during the first hour of their time with us, I truly wondered if there was hope.  The anger and walls seemed too great and nearly impossible to break down.  I believe a miracle truly happened this week!!  Jesus, in His gentle yet powerful way, began to soften their hearts and by the end of the day this couple was committed and even excited to move forward.  There was still fear and apprehension, but a strong desire to really make this marriage something more than it has ever been.

Along with the couples we have had in our home over the past couple weeks, Mike has had a steady schedule of visiting churches and working with their leadership teams.  Two weeks ago he was in Virginia, last weekend he was Indiana where he will return this weekend.  The following weekend he will be in Massachusetts and then enjoy a mens retreat with guys from our home church.  Whew!!!  Those are exhausting weekends for Mike, but exactly what God created from him to do!!!  

Thank you so much for your partnering with us in this journey.  Please continue to pray for us.  We need that more than you know!!  

  • Please pray for emotional, physical and spiritual health as Mike continues his travels through mid-October.
  • Pray for God's protection of our marriage as this is the evil one's prime target as we move forward boldly.  
  • Continued financial support, help in the areas of bookkeeping/accounting, technical help, website update, help in maintaining The Haven as needed.
  • Pray that the word would continue to spread about what is offered through Haven for the Heart.

Saturday, September 20, 2014

Building Communities that Transfrom Lives

Haven for the Heart
“Building Communities that Transform Lives”

From the outside, we can appear self-sufficient and able to handle life on our own, but on the inside there may be a different story.  Every person lives with personal and relational challenges.  In a very real sense, all of us need help.  Where do you run with the chaos of your life?  Who do you talk to about the true realities in your heart?  How do you lead those under your care?  Nothing can replace face to face involvement and nothing is more life changing than to experience a community with authentic faith and genuine love. 

Leading and loving those under our care can become overwhelming, discouraging and confusing.  Ministry, in its many forms, has a way of numbing the soul and disconnecting us from others - even God.
Those who are in the position of leading and shepherding often feel alone.  The people around them can easily miss the symptoms of personal burn out and relational break down.  Therefore, it is our desire to be a Haven for your Heart, so that you can be a Haven for the Hearts of others.

The fruitfulness and effectiveness of any church is rooted in the spiritual health of its relationships and leadership.  In the following pages, we introduce the process of CPR for the soul, which we believe is foundational to building communities of friends and mentors that transform lives.  This CPR process helps leaders, couples and teams in ministry revive their spiritual passion, relational connection and missional vision.  The Haven for the Heart retreat introduced in this packet will help you:
  • Connect with compassionate friends and courageous mentors.
  • Pursue the truth of God’s heart that transforms the soul.
  • Respond with a life of passion and purpose.

About Mike and Pam
Mike and Pam share a passion for pouring into the lives of others and pointing them toward a deeper relationship with Jesus. Mike has an extensive background in the areas of church ministry and leadership development. He has an earned Doctorate of Philosophy in Religion and Society and a Masters Degree in Biblical Counseling. He has practiced as a  licensed professional counselor and is an ordained pastor. He has ministered in mega church communities and house church families.  He also served at the university level for 17 years where he taught and mentored graduate and undergraduate students in biblical studies, church ministries, organizational leadership and discipleship counseling.  Pam has a bachelors degree in Family & Community Services as well as a Masters Degree in Christian Counseling. She enjoys the opportunity to care for women and partner with Mike in the pursuit of healthy marriages as well as strong ministry teams. 
Mike and Pam are governed by a deep belief in the power of the gospel to liberate hearts, and the place of the body of Christ to transform lives.  They have the ability to connect and equip an aging population with an emerging generation.  They’re devoted to cultivating communities of people who are spiritually alive in Christ (surrendered), relationally connected to one-another (devoted),  and missionally engaged in the world (unleashed).  This is most closely observed in the seminar classes and lab practicums where they focus on soul care and spiritual formation, leadership training and team development, church planting and mission strategy.  Mike and Pam provide spiritual direction, pastoral care and leadership mentoring.  If you need professional psychological services they will refer you to reputable agencies.                                         

CPR for the Soul
Experiencing the Difference - Equipped to Make a Difference
Over the years we've been blessed to listen to teachings from many dynamic speakers, as well as read books from many of our most brilliant authors. Their passion, wisdom, humor and devotion have deeply inspired and challenged us to new ways of thinking and living.  Though they educated our minds and encouraged our hearts – something was missing!  We've often scanned the audiences at conferences and observed the hopefulness on their faces.  They were challenged intellectually, moved emotionally and committed themselves to a new way of life and ministry – but what was missing?  We’re not ones to minimize the critical value of biblical teaching or motivational speaking. We need God's truth communicated in many ways. We've been profoundly impacted by preachers, authors and a host of inspirational events – but something was still missing!
The missing piece and critical ingredient that's central to any philosophy of counseling, education or ministry is Experience!  The years of training pastors, counselors and missionaries in the art of leadership have taught us that genuine comprehension and authentic transformation requires Experience!  The wisdom  maturity, and skill it takes to lead God's people cannot be attained by merely listening to a lecture or reading a book – it takes Experience!  There needs to be a place where we can take all that we have learned and discuss it in a setting that is small enough to truly talk through all the details pertaining to our own life and ministry.
The missing ingredient in many teaching methodologies and ministry strategies is the experience of RELATIONSHIP.  Our apprentice partnership requires the experience of relationship as you tackle your ministry challenges.  People need to see it done (modeling) and be able to practice it personally (mentoring). The apprentice approach was Jesus' pattern, “Come follow me and go do what I've done to you”. But this approach to counseling, education and ministry requires more time with fewer people.  In a culture that values bigger/faster, this process does not appear to be as successful or efficient. But that is how Jesus did it!
A Haven for Your Heart: Experiencing the Difference
The first goal is to help you experience community in a way that you become spiritually enriched and relationally encouraged. The realities of life have a way of drying up our hearts, disconnecting us from others, and detaching us from our larger purpose in life.  
There probably was a time when your heart was more alive and you experienced closeness with Jesus. There probably was a time when your heart was devoted to others in a way that led to meaningful connection. There probably was a time when your heart was engaged in God's larger purposes. But...life's pressures and stressors, the financial and physical losses, the relationship disappointments and conflicts have all had quite an impact on our soul. The anxieties, depression, loneliness, bitterness, sadness and emptiness can lead us to a host of addictions or dependencies that deaden our hearts, destroy our relationships and defame our God. Whether you're doing well and simply need some refreshment, or deeply struggling and need some encouragement, it's time to experience a “Haven for your Heart”.

A Haven for the Heart of Others: Equipped to Make a Difference
A second objective of Haven for the Heart is to provide a coaching experience where you can think through the implications of disciple making and community building for your ministry or church. We'll give you an opportunity to practice and process the dynamics of wisely, compassionately and skillfully nurturing life transformation, relational connection and missional incarnation.
People are struggling with a host of personal addictions and relational dysfunctions. They are often sitting next to us on the train, at our church services and in our living rooms. Sadly, most are suffering silently, ashamed and afraid to share. Issues come out in all kinds of ways which cloak the problem, hides the pain and cause people to either fight or flee. We, as their friends or mentors, often feel uncomfortable and helpless to deal with all the issues going on below the surface of people's behavioral patterns or relational styles. So we do our tasks, play the games and occasionally offer a word of encouragement or say we will pray for them.
God has given you a heart to love, the wisdom to draw out the real issues of the heart, and a body of believers who are gifted to build one another up! You might need help as a leader, couple or team in learning how to be the person who pursues people's hearts or facilitates a healing community. You may be on a team or in a community where you're authentically seeking and serving God together, or you may be longing and looking to participate in this kind of community. Either way, we'd like you to gain more insight and encouragement to more wisely and lovingly pursue peoples hearts and draw them into connecting with God and caring for others.
Participate in a Haven for the Heart Retreat 
This will not be a traditional retreat, therefore there may be a degree of uncertainty about what to expect. The atmosphere here will be casual and comfortable.  We offer a safe place for you to share your heart and discuss areas of concern to you.  We have spent many years in ministry ourselves, and know first hand the need to have a place to share, pray, dream and dialogue with others who understand the world we live in.
You may be joining us as a ministry team, married couple or simply by yourself.  You are likely coming with various areas to discuss concerning ministry challenges, marriage and family issues, personal struggles, etc.  This is your time and we will do all we can to make this a very meaningful experience for you.
After your assessment with Mike, a schedule for your time here will be designed with the intent of offering what is most needed.  You may be needing an extended time of dialogue, solitude and reflection or perhaps some time to get away and enjoy an evening with your spouse or team.  We are excited about the opportunity to provide a personally designed retreat to meet your personal needs and ministry goals. 
You are welcome to stay with us at The Haven.  The entire lower level of our home will be yours to enjoy, offering privacy and comfort.  There are two bedrooms.  One bedroom offering a king size bed and the other a queen size bed.  There is a full bathroom, as well as a half bathroom.  There is a comfortable living room area with a fireplace.  The Haven has a full kitchen, pool table and outdoor hot tub.  Depending on the schedule that is set, we will be providing various meals/snacks.  Please email us with information regarding any food restrictions or preferences.
We look forward to you joining us in our retreat settings or mentoring relationships as individuals, couples or teams.
As men with men or women with women - Come join five other men/women or allow one of us to join your small group/ministry team as we wrestle with biblical femininity or masculinity in a way that empowers and unleashes you to be godlier men and women, husbands and wives, fathers and mothers!
As couples in community with couples – Join with two other couples or bring the core couples with whom you're in community.  Pam and I will foster an environment and facilitate an experience that will encourage you in heart and connect you as couples to “one-another” in community.
As teams in ministry together – You can invite me/us to meet with your leadership team as we wrestle with your hearts, relationships and ministries. We'll reflectively and relationally assess and address the challenges of “Life Together” in four arenas of biblical health. 
If you are a follower of Christ you will be continually growing in your passion for God, your love for one another and your mission to those in the world.  This retreat is focused on helping us to honestly wrestle with our heart issues, relational dynamics and ministry challenges. We will model and mentor you through the CPR process:

Connecting With Others                                                                                       as we Share our Journey & Tell His Story of Life Together 
All effective models of biblical counseling or Christian education begin with the importance of genuine connection and authentic caring.  Relationship is central to all spiritual formation and discipleship.  Therefore, our first component is the dynamic of connecting with people in community.   There are a lot of challenges to this in a schedule oriented, technologically based and psychologically wounded society.  But the fruitfulness of biblical community rests in the health of our relationships and leadership.  People need one-anothering friends and shepherding-servant mentors!
Our first session will be an opportunity to Connect with one another.  When we meet together there will be a lot of laughter and tears as we celebrate God's incredible love and as we enter the real challenges of our hearts, relationships and ministries. We will foster an environment and facilitate an atmosphere that is both safe and stimulating – full of grace and truth!  This session is designed to help us explore two life changing dynamics

Pursuing God                                                                                                         as we Awaken our Passion & Embrace His Mission of Life Together 
People need encouragement to wrestle with the real issues in their lives and relationships.  Helping people in the process of personal and biblical  reflection is essential to spiritual formation and life change.  Honest study of the scriptures and guidance into the implications of what this means in each of our lives is key to our approach to biblical discipleship, spiritual formation and christian education. 
Our second session is designed to help us Pursue God together as people who long to be more surrendered and alive in Christ, more devoted and connected to one another and more unleashed and engaged in the world.  Pursuing God together will involve wrestling with the revelation of God's story and the realities of our own story.  This session has two aims:

Responding with Purpose                                                                                    as we Recapture His Vision and Reclaim our Devotion of Life Together 
There is no transformation without action!  This obedience can only come out of heart change.  Helping people to trust and obey God is critical.  Awakening peoples passion for Christ and inviting them to trust is a difficult responsibility and awesome privilege.  Directing peoples movement to obey is the ultimate fruit and goal of counseling, education and spiritual formation. Our final session will bring everything together and provide real guidance or encouragement to Respond with purpose in how we walk with God, love others and reach our world. 

It is our hope and prayer that this retreat will have been CPR for your soul and that you will leave being ready to give CPR to others in your community.  We will continue to develop and discuss the three dynamics of Connecting with others, Pursuing God together and Responding with purpose in our regional retreats and coaching contracts.

Next Steps

When we have the opportunity to meet with you, we want to be clear about our strategy for building Haven for the Heart.  For many years we have worked various jobs in teaching, counseling and pastoral ministry.  Pam and I now believe that God wants us to invest more fully in cultivating biblical communities through coaching christian leaders!  Many of our brothers and sisters in the trenches of leadership need the encouragement, training and mentoring, but do not have the resources to cover the costs.  

 Not everyone has the calling, gifts or time to communicate a message like this, or cultivate a ministry to church families and leadership teams.  But you can make a real impact as you partner with us!  We have a church family that owns the vision and values of Haven for the Heart.  As friends and mentors, they provide ongoing encouragement and accountability. We also have a Haven retreat center where leaders, couples and teams come for personal refreshment, relational encouragement, and ministry development.  Our church family is there to provide a visible taste of authentic caring and tangible hospitality. 

Haven for the Heart is a non-profit organization.  The process of revising our website, writing a field manual and raising our support as missionaries to christian leaders  has begun.  Since Pam and I are now becoming full time missionaries, truly making disciples of all nations through building leadership teams, we need you to partner with us in some concrete ways

We invite you to prayerfully consider partnering with us.  We will stay in close contact with those who are part of our Prayer Advisory Support Team (P.A.S.T.). You will be invited to an annual P.A.S.T. retreat and receive updated copies of our field manual.  We would like to discuss your participation on our team in the following ways:

Being a Prayer Warrior – The spiritual battle is fierce and we need people who are fighting for our hearts and the hearts of those we mentor.

Being a Wise Advisor – There's wisdom in the counsel of many.  We need the perspectives of           wise individuals as we navigate the challenges of coaching those who are leading healthy church families and household communities!  Many of you have wisdom and skill sets in areas that we don’t and we value your input and help.

Being a Financial Supporter -  Perhaps God would like to use you to invest into the lives of Christian leaders by financially supporting Haven for the Heart.  By doing this, you contribute to providing a setting where leaders can personally share what is happening in their lives and ministries, strengthen their relationships, and strategize about ways to effectively move forward.  When encouragement is provided to leaders it impacts their ministry and the world at large for His Kingdom!

There are various ways to contribute, but here is an example of what your donation could provide:
  • $1,000 donation underwrites a Haven for the Heart retreat and a one year coaching contract for individuals, couples or teams of leaders. leaders.
  • $100/month donation underwrites a Haven for the Heart Retreat and a one year coaching contract for a kingdom worker, couple or leadership team.
  • $50/month provides a Haven for the Heart retreat for a kingdom worker, ministry couple or leadership team.
  • $25/month provides a mentoring session for a kingdom worker, ministry couple or leadership team.

Contact us for information about how to sponsor leaders allowing them to participate in a personalized retreat with individualized mentoring and ministry coaching. 

Being a Host for a Haven for the Heart Seminar/Workshop -   We’ve designed a 3-6 hour seminar/workshop with two key components: 
  • “The Cry, The Call, The Challenge of Life Together” 
The seminar portion focuses on developing and discussing God’s story and our journey.
  • “Building Transformational Communities and Becoming a Spiritual Friend or Mentor”  
The workshop portion focuses on cultivating the CPR process through one to one and small group follow up conversations.   

Contact us if you are interested in more information about hosting a seminar/workshop for your church, community or region.
                   

Haven for the Heart
5415 Starwood Dr. Commerce, MI 48382
267-994-9116

dittman@havenfortheheart.com

Monday, February 3, 2014



There is a lot that has been happening over the past number of months through the ministry of Haven for the Heart! We are excited to keep you updated through this blog on the many ways God is touching the lives of Christian leaders.


We have invited numerous couples (pastors and wives) to the Haven for personal retreat experiences and witnessed God's gracious and powerful work in their lives. Simply having a safe setting to share their hearts with others who are familiar with the challenges they face opens the door for God to do incredible work!


Mike has also been partnering with Todd Fetters (Director of National Ministries Church of the United Brethren) to help strengthen and equip pastors within this particular denomination. He recently spoke at a pastor's retreat where his focus centered on the transformational power of a biblical community and the importance of encouraging and strengthening our leaders. Listen in on a conversation between Todd and Mike about building into the lives of leaders so that their churches or ministries can become more fruitful.

Click the link below to listen to the podcast, which is broken up into five parts:
Mike speaks on building transformational leaders and ministries.